The invisible hand

A long time ago when I worked in finance and group of my work colleagues and I had a few drinks one night after a hard day. We were all at a new trendy local bar sampling Asian cuisine food and locals wines.  One of the women who attended was a real piece of work but she was also very charming. She was lazy, spent most day hung-over and flirted with the male upper management so she could get promoted. As I was very hard working, and did more than my fair share of the teams work, I began to resent her.  But, that evening was very relaxed and enjoyable.

The following Monday she came to work extremely upset, confused and spent all weekend crying. She tearfully explained that her car had been vandalised! I really empathised with her situation as it was such a horrid thing to have happened. Our natural reaction was shock, horror and outrage. So, being the lovely sales team that we were we, (me included) sympathetically tried to help her figure out the culprit.  For weeks our sales team would gossip and point the figure at our work mates and come up with wild explanations. It was truly awful that someone could do something so nasty and we all really felt for her. It seemed a real mystery that no one could solve.  My theory was that some youths walked passed indiscriminately and carried out a random act of vandalism.

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Mean Girls

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Something I beat myself up about is the shame and embarrassment of being raped.  Having had at least half a dozen experiences of sex being forced on me, like many women, left me feeling worthless and unlovable.  However, one particular instance rocked my world for many reasons.

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