What’s your vice?

49273D4F-9373-43C1-9A5C-11D585A970DF.jpegAnother day and another headache. After many decades of habitual dope smoking I am on my first week of the detox. I have completely gone cold turkey and the physical symptoms my body is experiencing is very overwhelming. With body chills, headaches, stomach aches and mood swings, I’m being to think it’s easier to ween myself off instead of 100% nothing.

My history with illicit drugs is a long one. It started off with a marijuana joint given to me by my dad for my 11th birthday, followed by amphetamines at 16 (again, given to me by my parents) mushrooms and acid in my teens.

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What’s your number?

9EE55F76-87D5-4E4D-8361-49D0217DE916Yes, call me a nymph.

With an insatiable sexual appetite my number of sexual partners is much higher than the average women.  I am in no way ashamed of this, however it’s not something I disclose as promiscuity is frowned upon.  In most societies, especially if you’re a women, you will be labelled in a derogatory manner and I do hate being judged.

So, what’s my number to confession? Somewhere around 120 maybe a little higher.

Mean Girls

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Something I beat myself up about is the shame and embarrassment of being raped.  Having had at least half a dozen experiences of sex being forced on me, like many women, left me feeling worthless and unlovable.  However, one particular instance rocked my world for many reasons.

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Hello and Greetings

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Welcome my friends.  After a rather harrowing  period which saw a downward spiral of suicidal thoughts and self hate I am taking the positive steps to heal. For years I have been suppressing my shame, pain, violence, debauchery,  promiscuity, vices and my fucked up family.  The energy taken to suppress and play normal has had a huge effect on me and I want to be free from the past.  Now ready to release my sins and heal, I thought a fabulous healing process would to be to finally share my inner thoughts and experiences. Over the next one hundred days I will expell one demon at a time…… xoxo

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